αλλα υμεις ου πιστευετε οτι ουκ εστε εκ των προβατων των εμωτα προβατα τα εμα της φωνης μου ακουουσιν καγω γινωσκω αυτα και ακολουθουσιν μοι καγω διδωμι αυτοις ζωην αιωνιον και ου μη απολωνται εις τον αιωνα και ουχ αρπασει τις αυτα εκ της χειρος μου ο πατηρ μου ο δεδωκεν μοι παντων μειζον εστιν και ουδεις δυναται αρπαζειν εκ της χειρος του πατρος εγω και ο πατηρ εν εσμεν. John 10 (1881-WH)
but you do not believe because you are not my sheep. My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me. I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; no one will snatch them out of my hand. My Father, who has given them to me, is greater than all; no one can snatch them out of my Father’s hand. I and the Father are one. John 10 (NIV 2010)
2010 has been up there as one of the hardest years for me to be a Christian. As a very emotional person, my emotions have at times threatened to sweep me away from my faith and cause me to yearn an end to the emotional torture of continuing to abide with Him.
Things are greatly exacerbated when in your desperate loneliness and fear for the future, you are accused by those around you of 'exaggeration' or being a 'drama queen'. I consider these comments by those who claim to be my Christian family a great disloyalty and a betrayal, especially from those I have confided in.
Yet despite a real lack of comfort, it is not true to say that I have been left entirely without respite. John 10 has been one such oasis to me. I do not claim to fully understand all that John has to say in this passage but one thing I am sure of is the surety and conviction of the promise made by Jesus. What else could overcome a tidal wave of emotional doubt but a responsive affirmation of greater emotive strength. For the St Heleners among you, this is me using your lame arse "tone and feel tool."
The promise here is that those who are His sheep will never perish. In English, the presence of a double negative can sometimes extinguish the force of both words, not so in the case of this greek double negative. ου μη ("ou me" literally 'not not' or 'NEVER!!!!!!!!!') serves to reinforce the emphatic nature of the promise. In other words, Jesus says here:
"I give them eternal life, and they shall NEVER perish"
If that wasn't enough, John transliterates Jesus as saying εις τον αιωνα ("unto the age" or in other words, 'forever').
No one can snatch Lemmy out of Jesus' hands
Why? Because the Father has given Lemmy to Jesus
How is that assurance? Because the Father is greater than all powers in the universe
How can Lemmy be sure? Because Jesus and the Father are one - as with all the promises of God, they are secured because God is working together to make it happen
What is the mechanic of this guarantee? The members of the Godhead can never act in contravention to each other, they can never betray each other, never be disloyal to each other (I wish the bulk of my Christian friends were as loyal as that to me).
FUTURE?
What of it? despite the words of comfort, the goal remains the same, the task seemingly insurmountable, the fear - unfettered, the loneliness - magnifying. Every ounce of my soul is crying out to me that enough is enough, that I cannot carry on anymore, that I am risking my sanity and my physical life trying to stay as Paul would say "unto the obedience of faith."
But what can you do? Even if it there is a (snow) storm, you still have to plod home one way or another. I hope and pray it's true - the work is finished, the price has been paid, that I am homeward bound, and one day free. Please come quickly...
"Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already arrived at my goal, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus." Philippians 3
